All things Kinky....

So I made the leap and posted a shout out on the kinkster page for my soon to be new home town (formerly my college/grad school town). I got all kinds of lovely welcoming replies which is nice and actually gives me hope for being able to transfer my kinky self to the central part of the state in a positive way :)

I hung out with My Fellow Sub this evening and we had a lovely chat. I am not sure about our friendship. She appears to have some pretty bad self-esteem/self-image issues and although I do my best to provide friendliness and not therapy-ness I am always afraid that I end up slipping into therapy mode. Also she got super attached to me which isn't necessarily where I stand with her.

Apparently she totally took my nervous laughter/wittyness as confidence and ditzyness and popularity. Boy that just wowed me! I have never thought of being thought like that by anyone but she saw it as me being just another pretty girl who got all the guys!! I am kind of glad we got to talk about that honestly and I hope I was able to let her see that I do not see myself as popular or giggly at all!

We actually talked about a lot of things, mostly kink of course, but we talked about her relationship with the gentleman and what she is looking for in a significant other (she does not see the gentleman as an option and apparently he feels similarly). She didn't SAY she was envious but I could kind of hear in her voice that she is envious of the supposed fact that the gentleman actively wants to play with me and has said some negative things towards her (again the self/body image thing comes into play). I still deny being attractive to people though so >P

On a separate note, I mulled over the idea of public vs private and realize that my sense of "public" is a lot more than just, say a play party event or exhibitionism. It also includes people outside of the circle of privacy for a particular event. For example, there are only certain people with whom I discussed the details of the playdates and only a few that I would even want to know that it ocurred.....so privacy does not only mean privacy during the actual playing but also the knowledge of the event and talking about it...

I am really tired so I suppose I am just rambling at this point....